Frank from the Vault
Posted by characters | Filed under Uncategorized
LFA Historian here, and boy do I have big news. While shoveling some old Laugh Force Alpha memorabilia into the furnace for warmth today, mostly old Cowboy brand Rectal Thermometers that they took off the market for giving folks mercury poisoning after they shattered in peoples asses, which I do believe every last one did, well it was under all that malarkey that I found a trap door that led to hidden temple filled with horrible booby traps. Cautiously I descended into the temple. My Mom came with me. Well, someone had to make the sandwiches! Well after riding the cart through the fiery mine shaft, hopscotching the name of Mohamed over the bottomless pit, taking the invisible escalator, and then subsequently being chased by a giant rolling boulder that crushed my Mom, well friends, it was there that I found myself in a secret chamber that held the Holy Grail and an old Frank Jones 8-Track tape. Well the Knight of the Templar said I could only choose one or the other, so needless to say I hoofed it outta there with a fistful of Super Villain in Training.
You know, Frank Jones was a much different villain years ago. The Super Villain sketches of yore, or as I like to call them, Frank Jones: The College Years, were less concerned with total world domination, and more obsessed with annoying the general population. Here’s a clip of Frank working at the BMV. I like it! Why Mom, you haven’t looked THIS thin in years!
Frank Jones: Super Villain in Training - Episode 2: The BMV
Episode 6: All You Need is Love… and a Corporate-Ordered Intervention
Posted by Unibrowed Oilchild | Filed under Podcasts
Why is everyone on this space station avoiding you? Every time you stumble upon someone, they scatter like cockroaches, giggling and mumbling about Valentine’s Day and medieval weaponry. Hmm. Now you smell something in the air. You’re pretty sure it’s not love…
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Tags: 1950s sex, disinterested diamonds, episode 6, frank jones, love, love doctor, podcast, ted roberts, valentine
Another jewel from the vault
Posted by characters | Filed under Uncategorized
Oh, hello again. I’m your LFA Historian, and right now I’m perfecting my newest invention. It’s a radio/time machine. I like it! What’s it do, ya ask? You’re just like my mom. Always nagging me with your questions.
Did you make your bed? Is the laundry folded into perfect geometric shapes? Where did you hide my insulin?!?
Well luckily, you’re not my mom, so I WILL answer your question. Laugh Force Alpha is a comedy institution that’s been producing the ha-ha’s since 1902. Well unfortunately all the old vinyl recordings were lost in the great thermostat debate of 1927. This is where MY invention comes into play. With this baby I can pluck radio waves out of the air anywhere in the galaxy, no matter how old the signal might be. Well, here goes nothin’! I present to you, the first LFA sketch ever broadcast. It’s The Larry Langston’s Lower Lumbar Lube Comedy Hour! (Not really an hour, more like 2 minutes.) ENJOY!
MOM? Did you just find your insulin? I should’ve hid it someplace you’d never look… like under the bar of soap.
Larry Langston’s Lower Lumbar Lube Comedy Hour
Episode 5: Merry, Happy, HOLIDAY SEASON!
Posted by Unibrowed Oilchild | Filed under Podcasts
Something’s wrong. There has been a significant decline in anger-based activity aboard the Fortress of Laughitude. The crew hasn’t been this mellow since the time the runoff from Rainbow Sunflower’s hydroponics garden mixed with the drinking water. Heck, D.I.E. hasn’t even locked you in the Depressurizer lately. Not that you mind this, but it wouldn’t be a bad idea to find out if this recent good behavior isn’t just to lull you into a false sense of security…
Note: As a holiday present to us, celebrities lent their voices! No wait, that’s a lie. They were impersonated, as usual.
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Tags: cakefarts, dirty ole santa, episode 5, frank jones, holiday, liza minnelli, podcast, zombie assholes
One from the vaults…
Posted by characters | Filed under Uncategorized
Oh, hi again! It’s me, your LFA Historian speaking to you from inside the belly of the beast, also known as the Laugh Force Alpha Comedy Vault. My Mom’s in here somewhere. I think she might be buried under that giant pile of mini-discs. Me, I’m wading waist deep though these old cassette tapes. You know, 99% of the bits on these tapes are absolute crap, which is why I unspool most of ‘em and wrap the tape around my body as if trying to mummify myself. It’s a peculiar fetish, but I like it. There are, however, some pearls amidst the swine, much like the tape I have for you today. This one’s SO good, that the mere thought of wrapping this one around my Johnson, fills me with shame not felt since my youth, ogling the ladies in the Sears underwear catalog. Here’s some more Random Protesting Hippie for ya! Enjoy! …Mom? If you’re still alive… make me some Spaghettios!